Living in the Present Moment

mind·ful·ness

ˈmīndfəlnəs/

noun

1. 1.

   the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.

   "their mindfulness of the wider cinematic tradition"
2. 2.

   a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

 

I tend to get lost in regretting my past, and worrying about my future.  The control (and loss of control) I've had to possess to live any since of normalcy has drastically altered how I view life.  This behavior completely robs me of enjoying and experiencing the present moments.  I've learned that worrying about what is going to happen in the future is a negative contribution to the future.  Instead of doing things in the present moment that will affect its outcome I drive myself insane with what-ifs!  Of course when I'm not worrying about what will happen I'm dwelling on what did happen.  And again I'm robbing the present moment regretting my past.  

The only time it's acceptable to focus on the future is to plan it!

I'm learning to allow my past to remind me that I am wiser and stronger than I previously was.  I remember that I made the best decisions I could with the information and awareness I had.  When I view my past that way I'm able to begin to rebuild the trust I need in myself to make decisions about my present!  

5 ways to focus on the present moment:

1. Focus on your breathing. (in, out, in, out............)
2. Take notice of the things directly around you.  Notice the temperature, the smells. etc.
3. Embrace your present emotional state.  Don't wish happiness, sadness, just be as you are right at that moment.  Don't label your emotions, just be still and take them as they are.  
4. Turn on some music.  When I'm having a really hard time focusing I like to turn on my nature sounds station on Pandora.  I just focus on the sounds and this helps bring me back.
5. Consciously choose the present moment.  Sometimes I have to tell myself to stop wandering and come back to the here and now.  Sounds crazy but it works for me!  

Each person has to find their own path to mindfulness or living in the present moment.  In codependency recovery this is a necessity for keeping yourself grounded and emotionally sound.   We have lived our lives in utter chaos for so long it's often difficult to be okay in states of rest and peace.